Learn To Love Life

August 23, 2025

This blog is about being brutally honest with how I’m feeling. I don’t want this to be a filtered version of how I am supposedly learning to love my life. I want it to be the rollercoaster of how I fall in love with the life that I want to give myself.

So with that out of the way, let’s get started with talking about Day 4 of 90. I woke up anxious. I spent most of the day anxious. I went shopping with people and it was fun, but I was still anxious. Nothing I did seemed to help me feel any better. I also hadn’t even woken up early like I have been doing. I got up around 8:30 instead of my normal 6:30. I think that made the morning harder to be honest.

I had originally planned to go workout in the morning, but I really wasn’t feeling up to it. I listened to my body and decided to go through the day the way that I wanted to. I figured I would go to the gym in the afternoon or evening. When I got done shopping, I was exhausted.

The first week of school really took something out of me. I can’t even explain it. I just feel like I haven’t gotten any adequate rest even though I am sleeping well and for enough hours. Sometimes that just makes things even harder because what do you mean that I am resting, but not feeling rested?

Any despite all of that, it was a productive day. I checked everything off my list. I even made my weekly plan. It seemed impossible given that this week went a little rough. But I still did it. It’s not to say that I will always be able to push through those blocks, but I was able to today.

In the evening I had planned to go on a walk as my exercise, but again, I wasn’t feeling it. But, someone texted me telling me the sunset was gorgeous. What better time to go for a walk than at sunset? I got my ass out of my bed and put my headphones on. I knew I wasn’t going to go for a long walk. Maybe 15 or 20 minutes. That made it easier to do since there weren’t any real expectations.

The sky was gorgeous. It was breathtaking. The colors lit up the whole world, not just the sky. The pink was so vibrant. I walked about half a mile. By the time I was back in my dorm, the sun had completely set and there wasn’t even a bit of it peeking out. It was getting dark outside.

I watched some TV (criminal minds) and let myself relax in the living room. I realized it was getting a bit late, so I got ready for bed. I went back to the check list and realized that there were still some items to check off. I needed to make my daily plan, weekly plan, journal, and read. I was tired, but I knew that I had it in me to do this.

I pushed through the tired because I knew that the feeling of accomplishment would be better than the 20 minutes of earlier sleep.

On another note, I didn’t do any school work today either. However, this had been planned. I had planned to take today off from work. Even though I didn’t get anything done yesterday, I didn’t want to punish myself for it today. So, what I was supposed to get done yesterday will get done tomorrow. I don’t have any major plans for tomorrow aside from doing my laundry. Everything else is just go with the flow and do some homework.

If you have stuck along this far, thank you 🙂 I appreciate you reading this. I’m writing this so also I hold myself more accountable. Even if no one likes it, still writing this will help me work toward my goals.

Live Love Life, Yvie